Could I Be More Devastated About This Election Than I Was About My Divorce?

I received this text from someone I hold dear in my heart the day after the election and it stopped me in my tracks. No matter which candidate you supported, the 2016 presidential election has taught us that there are great divides in our country, differences paved over many years and steeped in domination, fear, and hurt. We know we won’t be able to bridge those gaps without a keen ear, open heart, and the kind of grace that transcends our own worm’s eye view to give way to the aerial perspective.

Encompassed in the American Dream is the dream of perfect union and marriage. At a micro-level, the vitriol, grief, and transformation that this election has invoked in the people who make up this country reminds me of the internal strife individuals experience during a divorce. And, I can’t help but compare it to the range of emotions parents and children face when their parents split up. The disturbing and the shining moments are all out in the open for the world to see. No matter what side you find yourself, there is one thing you can always do for everyone. You can hold space for your loved ones who are caught in the crossfire. Whether it is a grandchild, a sister or brother, or a friend, you can wish them well and here’s a start.

Blessings for Divorcing Parents

  1. May you honor the feelings – on both sides – that brought about this moment.
  2. May you be with your grief without spilling your negativity into your present choices.
  3. May you remember answers are not forged from disrespect and miracles grow naturally.
  4. May you show up with dignity when you find yourself at odds with a circumstance.
  5. May you each find the place where you can wish one another well.
  6. May your collective healing begin immediately.

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